(Cull-Again) get it?!
A friendship game! Share, reminisce, & laugh over stories about your social media/rolodex of friends you carry. Unwilling to lose a friend? Be ready to accept the challenge to keep or let them go, in this fun round-robin game of culling again and again where you may find yourself part of a cohort in cahoots.
Game Instructions
What you need
Table with 3+ friends
Contact/Friend list: Facebook, phone contact list, or any form of social media contact list
Agree on a sacrifice/punishment
Take a shot (of pickle-juice), chug a (carbonated) beverage, do 30 pushups, take a pinch from someone, or whatever the group desires.
Start the game
Doesn’t matter who goes first so long as it’s in a circle around the table. Once a round is played, feel free to shuffle seating positions to spice things up.
The Judge
Start by selecting the person left or right of you to be the Judge.
The judge picks a letter from the alphabet, or specifically pick a first or last name.
The Cull
Next, take out your phone and open your contact/friend list and go to the chosen letter or name – Point here is to somewhat randomly pick a contact/friend to select, the Cull.
If the judge, the person to your left, chooses, “K” or “Kevin”, you start at the “K” of your contact/friend list or the first friend named, “Kevin Abrams”. The judge can either choose this friend or do a brief scroll to select. Time limit applies.
Commence the culling
The Cull is presented to the group (share the profile image) and on the chopping block to be deleted from your friend list.
Yikes! What to do?!
You have several options to avoid this fate:
Option A) The cull is spared (keep them on the list) BUT MUST SHARE how you met, or became friends, along with an anecdotal story of why you want to keep them as friends. Table majority agrees on the quality of the story with the Judge to determine final tie breaker (if there is one).
Option B) The cull is spared (keep them on the list) STAY SILENT, SHARE NOTHING, BUT MUST take the punishment (you alone).
Option C) The cull is removed (unfriend/delete) STAY SILENT, SHARE NOTHING, BUT MUST cull the contact. In solidarity, if this Option C is chosen, the entire table must take the punishment (except for you of course), as a tribute to this cathartic act of creating space.
The Twist
The twist in the game allows for potential interrupts — Namely if option B (staying silent accepting the punishment) is chosen.
- Exclaim, “Culligan!” – Anyone at the table can challenge your silence by matching the punishment, you must resort to either option A or C. You can obviously raise the stakes by meeting the challenge with challenge but this isn’t a hazing contest so be responsible. Rock on if you’re doing pushups.
- Exclaim, “Cohort!” – Anyone at the table can be the “hero” and jump in by offering:
- Option A – An anecdotal story of their own involving both you & your friends | Yay, your cull is spared. Thanks to your cohort story-telling hero. #cohorthero
- Option B – Offer to be the surrogate. Both STAY SILENT, SHARE NOTHING, BUT the surrogate takes the punishment in your stead. | Yay, your cull is spared. Thanks to your surrogate. #cohortsilence
Double Jeopardy/Twist
This obviously gets more interesting if you happen upon a sequence where Option B (silent and accept punishment) leads to a Culligan challenge, coupled with a Cohort surrogate savior – leaving two people taking the sacrifice/punishment while remaining silent, sharing nothing.
A final resort by the remainder at the table is offered.
All exclaim, “Cohort Culligan!” – Everyone remaining at the table matches the punishment and you + your cohort surrogate MUST SHARE an anecdotal story together of why you want to keep the cull as friends without aligning storylines. Charades are an acceptable form of communication.
The alternative here for you + your cohort hero is to claim, “Authentic Feedback” mode.
Authentic Feedback Mode
Both you + your cohort hero must whisper authentic feedback about each other to the person next to you. This feedback is then relayed (like the game telephone) around until it reaches each other. If you happen to be sitting next to each other, then whisper it the opposite direction with feedback crossing over amongst the table friends. Be warned! Intentional or unintentional manipulation of the feedback amongst the table is possible.
Congrats, you’ve reached epic levels of friendship, the nirvana of genuine authenticity!
The alternative to giving authentic feedback is to stay silent – both accepting your sacrifice/punishment. Be warned, someone can still claim, “Culligan” here.
However, both of you + your cohort hero must be in sync. Either both give authentic feedback or take the sacrifice/punishment together. Otherwise, the ultimate outcome is both must delete each other from your lists. Remember, the group takes the punishment in solidarity to honor the act.
Don’t worry, you’ll have plenty of opportunities the next day to actually re-friend/re-connect in person. *That’s if you remember!
That’s it!
Repeat around the table with a new random letter to cull off your contact/friend list till you either have no friends left, inebriated with your carbonated drink, buff AF, or filled with memorable genuine stories to reminisce over.
What if?
In the off chance the cull happens to be someone at the table, the game automatically moves into authentic feedback mode with you and the cull to give authentic feedback to each other. Remember it isn’t a direct feedback, but a game of telephone around the table.
Honorable Mentions
At the end of the game/night there will undoubtedly be a shining star among you to be named:
Count Culligan – You know who you are you #cullhole. You, who constantly challenges everyone’s silence. The masochist who enjoys the punishment sacrifices more than anything. The thirsty one who seems to have a liver of steel yet unlimited pushup potential. The journalist sucking everyone dry by going on-the-record.
Cohort Savior – Everyone’s #cohorthero. The savior among you who’s tight lips holds everyone’s secrets. The ridiculously wicked good memory with a penchant for storytelling and parables.
Share
https://www.instagram.com/dontcullme/
Honor yourselves by tagging your group selfies #cohortculligans along with stories at #dontcullme
Tag your #savedcull so they know to appreciate you even more.
Caption your sealed lips with #cullsilence or openly share your #cohortstory for all to enjoy your wonderful memories.
Thank your #cohorthero for saving you and providing genuine authentic feedback, albeit watered down from your fellow #cohortculligans.
If you’re looking for excuses to cull your contact/Facebook friend’s list but afraid of ramifications, cancel culture, and social suicide?
Here you go. You’re welcome.
Version 0.3